Our "Normal" Day

We've finally gotten to the place where Joel is consistently following a daily routine. He is a pretty flexible baby, so the times in our routine often change. He does, however, follow a similar schedule each day. I wanted to write it down, so that I can refer back to it with other children. I think it will be interesting to see what our other kiddos are like when it comes to sleep and scheduling. In my humble opinion, every baby is different. Some babies need rigid schedules, while others are successful on more flexible routines. It all depends on the family and the child. I'm interested to see how our next babes will be! 

All of these times are approximate. If Joel wakes up a little earlier, the whole routine moves up. If he wakes up later, the whole routine moves back.

6 AM: Nurse and change diaper, say "hi" and "bye" to dad, put back in crib

9 AM: Wakes up and nurses

11 AM: First meal (usually fruit and Cheerios/crackers/breakfast bread)

12 PM: First nap (I get work done)

1 or 2 PM: Nurse and second meal (usually whatever I'm eating for lunch ... rice, chicken, veggies, noodles, etc.)

4 PM: Nurse and second nap (I get work done and make dinner)

6 PM: Wakes up and eats dinner (usually vegetables and some of what we're having)

8 PM: Nurse

8:30 - 9:30 PM: Bedtime routine (bath, book, nurse, brush teeth, bed ... aka the five B's)

Yes; he goes to bed "late" and wakes up "late," but it works for us! It allows me to get things done in the morning and allows Adam to see Joel for an extended period of time at night. It also allows us to stay out late(ish). On the other hand, it does not work well when we have to be out of the house early in the morning. Of course, this will allllll change when I start working out of the home again and when we have more kids! Such is life!

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Ten Month Update

I haven't written in a while and have a lot of updates on Joel. It's crazy how time passes! Joel is

• Drinking from a sippy cup
• Self-feeding solids
• Nursing five to six times per day
• Typically taking two naps per day for a total of two to three hours 
• Giving high fives
• Waving bye-bye
• Following one-step commands
• Understanding (but testing) the words "don't" and "no"
• Saying "mama" and dada"
• Trying to dip his spoon into food (sometimes successfully)
• Feeding himself with a spoon (but often not getting all of the food off before pulling it out)
• Enjoying peek-a-boo
• Singing/squealing in the back seat of the car
• Sleeping 10-12 hours per night with one morning feeding
• Walking everywhere
• Learning to walk in shoes in public
• "Petting" animals
• Nodding "yes" and "no"
• Looking for objects after they are taken away from him
• Glancing at mom for approval when meeting new people
• Still loving to turn the pages of a book and "tell the story"/babble
• Taking things apart
• Sneaking up the stairs
• Clapping
• Finding and plugging in the outlet protectors when we've forgotten to put them back in (OH MY!)
• Trying to share his food with others (including inanimate objects)
• Getting and bringing back objects (including a ball)

I'm sure I'm forgetting something, but that was a pretty good start. As for me, I am enjoying every precious minute with my little guy. I love the roles of nose-wiper, diaper-changer, grape-peeler, food-slicer, hand-holder, picker-upper, protector, playmate, teacher, etc. I am very thankful for the provision of being able to work at home this year!

A perfect fall day

First Halloween

Nine Months, More Steps, and No Naps

We can't believe that Joel is already nine months. We went to the doctor yesterday for his check-up. He actually lost ten ounces since his sick visit a few weeks again. He's also become more mobile and has started feeding himself lately, which probably has something to do with his weight loss. Joel weighed 22 pounds and 3 ounces (76th percentile). He was about 29 inches long (76th percentile), and his head circumference was about 18.25 inches (80-something(th) percentile). These are the lowest percentiles we've seen so far!

Joely celebrated his nine-month birthday by taking ten steps last night (with pauses to straighten up between steps). He's also been celebrating by skipping naps these past few weeks. I've taken lots of suggestions and nothing is seeming to help. Hopefully, it's just a stage. Is anyone else in the same boat right now?

Roseola, First Steps, and Another Tooth

Since I last wrote, we went to the doctor for a rash. It turns out that Joel had Roseola. The rash is almost all the way gone today. After taking him to Urgent Care (because it was Labor Day), he came home and took his first few steps. Four steps is his maximum for now. I think it will be awhile before he starts really walking. He is still pretty timid and only does it when he is beside something he can grab if he starts to fall. The next day, he cut another top tooth. This makes four on the top and two on the bottom. You'd think he'd learn how to chew with those chompers, but he still prefers baby food.

Five Little Toofies and Standing

I was able to snap a picture of Joel with all five teeth last week. I also got one of him standing, which has been one of his newer developments. This week, he got his first virus and fever. We were shut in for a few days, but I am thankful that it took him this long to get sick. Since he was sick, we spent lots of time reading board books. He picked up on how to turn the pages ... well, if the pages are separated a little. Here are some new pictures of his latest developments.

Our First Vacation to the Beach

During the first week in August, we took our first family vacation to the beach as a family of three. Both sets of grandparents, along with Adam's brothers, sister-in-law, and niece, were there. It was a very relaxing trip. We didn't go out much, but were able to spend lots of time on the beach.

Joel loved crawling in the ocean water. That didn't surprise us very much, though; he loves bath time! He tasted lots of sand and salt water, and tried to eat a few sea shells. He also really enjoyed the outdoor shower that we used to rinse off before going in to the house. We can't wait to take him next year, although he'll probably be harder to keep up with.

Joel Turns 8 Months Old

Today, Joely man is eight months old. Time is going by pretty quickly, and we are savoring every minute with him. Joel has been changing a lot over the past few weeks. His crawl is becoming faster, and he's starting to let go of things when he's standing. He is very interested in anything that opens and closes or turns on and off, and still loves all electronics. He has started to chatter a lot more, and likes "having a conversation" with just about anyone, including the characters on TV.

Three (yes, THREE) top teeth cut through in the past week. So, he now has a total of five teeth. Despite having more teeth than most babies his age, he is still not very interested in most finger foods. I guess we'll stick to milk and baby foods for now. We will go to the doctor for height and weight measurements in early September, so I will give an update on other developments then.

Alphabet Wall

In late June, I finally finished a project I started a long time ago ... Joel's alphabet wall. Trying to stick with our gender neutral theme (just in case we are blessed with a girl in the future), I figured this would be able to stay on the wall for a while. I bought the letters and paint at Jo-Ann's and Michael's. I picked blue, orange, teal, brown, and purple for the colors. I used a ruler and level to get the letters as straight as possible and used mounting tape to stick the letters to the wall.

6.5 Month Check-up and Update

I haven't blogged in a while, so I feel like I have a lot to jot down to keep all of Joel's new adventures up to date. On July 3rd, Joel went for his six month check-up. He was a little delayed because of a cold that both of us had for two or three weeks. (I didn't want him to get any vaccinations while he was sick.) He weighed 21 pounds and 3 ounces, which is in the 93rd percentile. He was 28.5 inches long, which is in the 94th percentile. Most surprisingly, he jumped from the 75th percentile in head circumference to the 90th percentile with his head measuring 18 inches. Grandma said it was because "His brain is just getting so big."   :)   Joel got three shots and an oral vaccine. He took them like a champ, only crying on the initial prick of each shot. (Last time he cried all the way home.) He was a little clingy later in the day though. We left the doctor's office feeling blessed to have such a healthy young boy!

In other news ...

Joel is more efficient with crawling now, even
though he still uses his one-leg-up method.

He loves pulling on everything in sight, including
other children (not good). 

It is starting to take a lot more energy
to keep up with him now that he's on the move.

Joel loves bath time and enjoys splashing and
playing with his bath toys. He really enjoyed his first
trip to the pool too (as expected).

My First Mother's Day

We spent this Mother's Day in Fieldale with my family. We made a special visit to Greatgrandma and Greatgrandpa Shivley's house to take a four generation picture. 

Joel enjoyed looking at the pretty flowers at Grandma Cheryl's house. He even picked me a flower petal. It was a very sweet first Mother's Day gift!

Update on Joel

Joel is about five and a half months old now. We are thinking he weighs about twenty pounds. He enjoys sitting up, standing with support, reading books, trying to crawl, rolling off of the changing pad, playing peek-a-boo, jumping and bouncing, watching children and animals play, pushing from stomach to sitting, and being tossed in the air. He really dislikes being in his car seat for any extended period of time. While I'm sure cutting teeth is painful, he's being a pretty good sport. Maybe he'll get tooth #3 soon.

His one leg up crawling method

Sitting up with drool to the floor

He has tried several types of foods: avocado, white and brown rice cereal, banana, sweet potato, carrot, peas, green beans, pear, peach, and mango. I think he likes peas and green beans the most and mango the least. He now eats about the equivalent of one jar of baby food a day over two feedings.

My Must-have Baby List

Since having my first child, I've been asked several times what I would recommend to give a new mom or what I would recommend registering for as a new mom. I am hesitant to write this down, because one hears SO much advice when getting pregnant or starting the adoption process. I would love to have feedback from other moms on the advice I'm giving below. If it doesn't seem like good advice for you, feel free to discard it. I'm a first-time mom, definitely not an expert. Also, it might help you to know that I have limited unused storage space (as most of us do), so I try to avoid buying and having anything excessive. Some of this advice may not apply. There may be differences depending on space in your home, breastfeeding vs. formula feeding, your plan for spacing between children, etc.



Here is a list (in no particular order) of the things I think of when I am asked the above-mentioned questions. I'll mention some of the bigger items at the end, since relatives, close friends, or a combination of gift cards usually buy those.

1. Diapers and wipes are a top priority, especially if planning to use disposable.
Sidenote: Did you know a newborn uses 10-15 diapers a day, sometimes more?!?! Be prepared!

2. If planning to nurse, I found the following items to be helpful: a nice pump, especially for working moms (I like Medela, the yellow brand); nursing pads (I like Lansinoh, the purple brand); milk storage bags (Lansinoh); an electric pump car charger if traveling a lot or pumping in the car often; a Boppy pillow; a nursing cover; and burp clothe (Gerber prefolds work well)
Sidenote: You can get a lot of supplies and samples you need only at first from the lactation consultant at the hospital.

3. A lot of people forget to register for medical/grooming stuff. Thankfully, some of my friends knew to get me them: pain/fever reducer, teething gel or tablets, diaper cream (a lot of people like Triple Paste), and gas drops. I did register for a health care set. The nail clippers, thermometer, and nasal aspirator were must-haves for us. I also registered for some sensitive baby body washes and lotions, just in case Joel was sensitive. The lavender baby lotion smells really good, too. While not a necessity, I splurged and put it on my registry. If having a summer baby, you might want to register for baby sunscreen. A humidifier could be a good gift, too.

4. I took some friends' advice on a stroller. I got a Snap-n-Go, which fits almost all car seat brands. It is much lighter than a travel system. Another thing to have with the car seat or stroller when out and about is a car seat cover. It helps keep light out and somewhat deters people from peeking at a sleeping baby.

5. Big swaddling blankets (mine shrunk and were too small after about three weeks) 
Sidenote: Not all babies like being swaddled, but I am interested in trying a Woombie next time. Joel was able to get out of the Velro swaddlers fairly quickly.

6. A few fitted sheets and two mattress pad covers to alternate should do. Don't register for blankets. People enjoy making them as special gifts. We chose to get a mesh bumper (due to debate over bumper use), and have really liked it.

7. Back pack diaper bags and fold-up changing pads with a place to put wipes and diapers are super useful. Two shoulder straps are easier than one. The bag doesn't fall off when you bend over to pick other things up.

8. Register/buy things for a few months down the road. My friends will probably laugh at this, since I'm such a planner. The little things you need around five or six months add up, though. Trust me ... I'm there. I'd recommend registering for a few plastic bibs. You can wipe them down instead of washing them every time. Usually these are a little bigger, so you'll still need smaller cloth ones. Don't register for cloth bibs. People will give you these because they are cute! I'd also get spoons, sippy cups, a bottle brush, a squeezy spoon for travel (a food container with a spoon tip), and a freezer tray for homemade baby food. By the way, you don't need an expensive baby food maker. Regular blenders and choppers work fine. Last for this list, I'd register for a shopping cart seat cover with bumpers on the sides. I have recently found this helpful. I no longer have to take up half of the cart with the car seat. Plus, Joel really likes sitting up and seeing everything. 

9. If you'd like to register/buy a bigger item, these are the things I found have most useful: crib, mattress, breastpump, glider/rocker, highchair, Pack-n-Play (for travel and hanging out with friends), and an infant car seat (we like our Chicco Key-fit). If I were to register again, I would also put a second stage car seat on the registry. They can be really expensive. (We're saving for that now.) We didn't buy a changing table. We just throw a changing mat, prefold cloth diaper, or my changing pad on the floor. 




You might be asking where all of the other stuff is, so here is my humble opinion on that. Borrow swings, bouncy seats, Johnny Jump-ups, exersaucer, play yards, bassinets (unless using a Pack-n-play type thing), clothes, bottles, baby-wearing gear, and Bumbo seats. For a first baby, try these things out at a friend's house. See if your baby likes it. If not, don't buy one until the next kid comes around. You'll be glad you saved the space and used your gift cards for diapers. You really only need a few things to sit the baby in when you need a break. Having one of all of the above out isn't necessary. For instance, we have all of the above, except for a bassinet. We borrowed a Bumbo, got a used Johnny Jump-up after figuring out that he liked it, bought an exersaucer after trying it at a friend's house, and were given used bottles. We got the the swing, bouncy seat, and play yard at our shower, but borrowed them from friends to see if he liked them before opening them. We have clothes through size 4T from friends and relatives that are done having kids. Babies do need clothes to wear, but I wouldn't recommend registering for them. Most people aren't able to resist how cute they are, and throw an outfit in with a gift anyway. Buying gently used clothes at a consignment shop is a huge cost-saver, too. If you bought or were fortunate enough to be given all or most of the things above, let someone borrow yours to get it out of your house/storage for a while. 

When we had Joel, we got a ton of toys. Because I'm a person that feels overwhelmed by excess stuff, I actually re-gifted or returned about a fourth of the toys we were given. (Sorry if you gave me a toy. I probably didn't return yours!) If you ask any experienced mother, they will probably tell you that a child has a select few favorite toys. What they really like to explore are things you have lying around the house. For instance, Joel loves wipes cases. I know I'm a teacher, but if you are going to buy a child a toy, make it a toy with some sort of developmental value. 

One last piece of advice: I would recommend having shower hosts ask for a book with a message inside, rather than cards.

Breakfast Made Easy

I found this idea on Pinterest. Plop eggs into a muffin pan (mine just happened to be square) and bake at 350 for 13-15 minutes. I greased the pan first and put onions in the bottom. I've also added red peppers and would like to try adding spinach. Adam puts two on regular bread to make egg sandwiches in the morning, but they would be the perfect size for English muffins. I made six eggs on Sunday night, and he had a quick breakfast until Wednesday!

 This would be great for big families or a big breakfast gathering, too. It's so easy! The eggs are off of the stove top and out of the way (for cooking pancakes or sausage or bacon), and all of the eggs are ready at the same time!

Marriage Reflections Continued ...

Earlier, I posted some reflections about some things I have learned so far in marriage. This will be a shorter continuation of that. I realize I wrote kind of a lot on the first set of reflections. Again, these are in no particular order.

5. It is important to pray for your spouse on a regular basis. Pray for his spiritual development, his day-to-day tasks, and his struggles. It's also important to pray together regularly. Pray for each of you to have patience and forgiving hearts. Pray for your finances, big life decisions, and intimacy with one another. Oh ... and an added bonus ... it is more difficult to get angry about a fault your spouse has when you are actively praying together for that particular area in his/her life.

6. Avoid extreme words and exaggeration ("you always" and "you never") when in a disagreement. It's just simply not true that your spouse alllllwwaaays or neeevvveer does something, even if it feels like it!

7. God first. Then marriage. Then kids. In my personal opinion, if parents aren't showing and receiving love, kids have a more difficult time doing so. It's important to continue dating your spouse, even if it means spending $20 extra on a date because you need a babysitter. (You could swap date nights and babysitting with another couple every once and a while, too!) Take time to talk about your interests and your dreams. Be silly ... and romantic!


8. It's important to have married mentors in your life. Our pre-marital counseling was so helpful. We learned how to enter, be in, and leave a disagreement. We learned how to give and receive love from one another. We discussed our finances before having any struggles with how to spend money. Pre-marital counseling is educational and preventative, and I'd urge anyone to participate in it. 

Along the same line, I'd urge married couples to find a mentor couple, to read books on marriage together, and to attend marriage conferences and retreats together. It's important to be actively pursuing Christ's love and peace in your marriage, whether you are struggling or not. Couples don't necessarily have to go to a marriage conference because they are struggling. Many go because they want to continue to make their marriages stronger.

9. The last piece of advice that we've found helpful (and that I have time think of and type about before my 5 month old wakes up) is to fellowship with other Christians independently and together. It is always beneficial to be edified and encouraged by someone you trust.

That's all for now! I wonder what advice I'll add when I read this a few years down the road ...

Baby food!

While I have mixed emotions about my baby needed me less and less, I am excited that Joel doesn't need me at every feeding anymore. Okay ... so right now, he's only eating baby food once a day. It is a step in the right direction, though!

To celebrate, I decided to plan ahead and make some baby food - mushy bananas, mmmm!

I am also happy to report that I got this nifty container at Target for $2.04. That's right! It was originally $9.99. They obviously placed all of these containers under the wrong price tag. So, I politely made them aware of it and got the containers for the cheaper price.

A Few Things I've Learned About Marriage ...

As my husband's birthday and my first Mother's Day has been approaching, I've been thinking a lot about marriage. I've thought about our marriage, our friends' marriages, advice we've been given from mentors, and wisdom we've gained from Scripture. Since this topic has been on my mind, I wanted to take some time to reflect on some of the things I've learned about marriage over the past four years. I'm sure that most of you reading know these things, but I wanted to have something to look back on a few years down the road. These are in no particular order. I'll just write in the order that thoughts come to me.

1.  A simple piece of wisdom that has been shared with us multiple times is that a husband and wife are most close when they are both close with God. The diagram below has always stuck out in my mind (perhaps because I'm a Geometry teacher). As the husband grows independently closer to God on the left and the wife grows independently closer to God on the right, the two naturally get closer to one another. The diagram is also a good reminder that our personal relationship with God should not be dependent on that of our spouse. (It is healthy to independently or interdependently develop our relationships with God, but it is not healthy to equate another's relationship with God to our personal relationship with God.) Even if one spouse feels distant from God, the other spouse's relationship can pull the couple closer. Imagine the wife at the bottom of her side of the triangle (the bottom right vertex, if you will). If her husband is even a little closer to God than she is, the distance between her and her husband is shortened (the length of the hypotenuse changes for the better). Even though I feel the following verse is referring to a spouse who is married to a non-believer, the diagram reminds me of the concept of "winning over" in 1 Peter 3:1.

2. Never talk down to your spouse or talk negatively about him/her to others. No one reacts well to someone who thinks he/she is better than him/her. (This goes both directions. I just don't want to keep writing "him/her".) Does this mean that you can't discuss marital issues with a trusted friend, mentor, or counselor? By no means! I see this advice most applicable in my marriage when Adam is doing something a different way than I might do it. Even if meant in the most sincere way possible, it's very difficult for a spouse to think you are being respectful when you say, "Well, if you would've done it my way, then that wouldn't have happened!" I also struggle with this when joking with others about Adam. Some jokes about something he "messed up" or is unable to do can be viewed as borderline disrespectful or embarrassing for him. While sometimes funny to joke about, I'm still working on making sure certain topics are okay to joke about in front of others. I know it's impossible to always know how a spouse will react, but it's worth the forethought to attempt to avoid conflict. (No ... my husband is not too easily offended. He's super laid back, but it's still important to think about.) On a similar note, offensive remarks by one spouse paired with defensive behaviors from the other put bystanders in awkward positions. No matter how close of friends they might be, others don't want to see you and your spouse arguing, rolling your eyes, etc. on a regular basis.

3. Marriage should be a cornerstone, not a capstone in life. This article presents an interesting perspective on marriage and college graduates. While I see the pros and cons of getting married before, during, or after college, I like the points that the article makes about the role of marriage in life. Marriage is not something you do once you get all your ducks in a row (capstone). It's something you do as you get your ducks in a row. As the article puts it, "Marriage actually works best as a formative institution, not an institution you enter once you think you're fully formed." See more on this in #4. 

I'd also like to add that marriage shouldn't be a stepping stone. It's not about personal gain. Marrying to experience "the ring", engagement, a fancy wedding, getting pregnant, and having a baby will end in complete failure. Relying on the joy you feel in those particular moments will not get you through a marriage. The fact is, those moments don't last forever. In fact, they don't last very long at all. Marriage isn't about you or you being happy all the time. See more on happiness in the next section.

4. Marriage isn't as much about Adam and I as it is about glorifying God. I will not try to fully explain this, but if interested in a really great book about this topic, you should read Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas. As the book explains in great detail, our marriages are not always about being made happy. Often times, they are about being made holy. Holy more than happy! This includes the difficult process of learning how to ask for forgiveness and to extend grace in a Christ-like manner. It also includes enjoying God's design for marriage to the fullest. When we enjoy such things (like intimacy or perhaps parenting), they create in us a deep desire to seek a relationship with the one who designed it that way. I guess what I'm saying here is that there is a time for sharpening one another/difficult times and a time for simply enjoying one another. Both are meant to help us become more holy and to help our marriage glorify God. As much as society would not have us think so, marriage (and life) is not as much about our happiness as it is glorifying our God.

Well, enough typing for today! It's bedtime for this Momma! Perhaps I'll continue these reflections in a future post.

Jammin' Out

On Monday night, we got a very exciting toy in the mail. Joel loves his Step 'n Play Piano! Perhaps he's the next Beethoven? 

Rice Cereal

Joel is on his third day of rice cereal. He likes it so far, but I think he liked the avocado better.

Let's Go Orioles!

Sitting in his new high chair

Adam thinks this one looks like Uncle Luke

"This game sure is a nail biter!"

"Get emmmm'!

He loves his daddy!

Up Close

Thought it'd be cool to get some close-ups of Joel tiny features!

Joel's First Food (Avocado)

"Hmm ... what's this stuff?"

"I'm not so sure about this, Dad!"

"Not too shabby!"

"I can do it by myself, Mom!"

Pretty good for a first attempt!

Three meals to use up fresh cilantro ...

When buying or growing fresh herbs, I like to have a plan of how I am going to use them so that they don't go to waste. This week I bought fresh cilantro, and this is how I've been using it. I also had cheese, onion, chicken, lime, and BBQ sauce that needed to be used. I have no idea how much I used of each ingredient, because I don't measure (which can sometimes be a bad thing).

1. Pico de gallo: tomato, onion, fresh cilantro, jalapeno, and lime juice (I put this on Morningstar Spicy Black Bean Burgers with guacamole and pepper jack cheese).

2. Hawaiian pizza: crust (I used Pillsbury Artisan), BBQ sauce, pulled chicken, onion, diced pineapple, mozzarella cheese, topped with fresh cilantro

3. Avocado chicken salad: pulled chicken, avocado, onion, lime juice, pinch of salt, and fresh cilantro

More Pictures from Week 17

Tickle Time

Love that look!

Before his first Hokie tailgate (Spring Game)

A Nice Spring Day

Grandma Time

Rocking Chair Photo Shoot

The first two are cute!

The others are just funny!